Fucking sweet!
%
Kyle's mom is a big fat fucking bitch!
%
Kick the baby.
%
Don't kick the baby.
%
Well fine, go ahead and miss church, and when you die and go to hell you 
can answer to SATAN!

Ok
%
Ike! You broke another window! That's a bad baby. Bad baby!
%
Kyle! We're going to the Terrance and Philip movie!
%
Oh my god, dude!
%
Aw, ma! He's not even my real brother, he's adopted.
%
Mom, somebody's at the door.

Coming hon!

Hey! I can't see the TV!
%
What are you guys doing here?
%
Oh, sweet, dude! Yes! Yes!
%
Off to the movies we shall go where we learn everything that we know. 'Cause
the movies teach us what our parents don't have time to say! And this
movie's gonna make our lives complete.
%
Super sweet!
%
Thank God we live in the quiet little redneck podunk white trash quiet
mountain town.
%
U.S.A.!
%
Can I have 5 tickets to Terrance and Philip, Asses of Fire, please?
%
We have to see this movie, dude!
%
Aw, screw it. It probably isn't all that good anyway.

Cartman, what are you talking about? You love Terrance and Philip!

Yeah, but the animation is crappy.
%
Look Mr... Homeless Guy. If you don't want to buy us tickets, and not get 
yourself ten bucks and buy yourself a bottle of vodka, be my guest.
%
Let me have some candy, Cartman.

Let me see... Uhh, nope, I don't have any Jewish candy.
%
You really need all that chocolate, fat boy?
%
Boo boo bah bah.
%
You're such a pigfucker Philip!
%
What did he say?
%
Hmmmmm, let's see. Well, first of all, you fuck pigs.

Oh yeah!
%
Fuck my ass and call me a bitch!
%
You shitfaced cockmaster.
%
Listen you donkey raping shit eater.
%
You'd fuck your uncle!
%
Shut your fucking face, uncle fucka! You're a cock sucking, ass-licking
uncle fucka!
You're an uncle fucka, yes it's true, nobody fucks uncles quite like you!
%
What do you expect? They're Canadian.
%
Suck my balls!
%
Dude! That movie was fucking sweet!
%
You bet your fucking ass it was!
%
Fuck dude, I want to be just like Terrance and Philip!
%
Huh?
%
Fuck off you donkey raping shiteater!
%
Hey! Stop crowding us you shitfaced cockmasters!
%
Yeah, you're all a bunch os ass ramming uncle fuckers.
%
Stan, tell them about when Terrance called Philip a testicle shitting rectal
wart.
%
Asshole I'm talking to you.
%
Yes, yes, I saw the Terrance and Philip movie. Who wants to touch me? I said
who wants to fucking touch me?
%
I hate you Kenny.
%
Ok children, let's take our seats, we have a lot to learn today.
%
Ok, now let's try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard.
Anyone? C'mon, don't be shy.
%
Shut up fat boy!
%
Hey, don't call me fat you fucking Jew!
%
Eric! Did you just say the *F* word?

Jew?

No, he's talking about fuck. You can't say fuck in school you fucking
fatass.

Kyle!

Why the fuck not?

Eric!

Dude! You just said fuck again!

Stanley!

Fuck!

Kenny!

What's the big deal? It doesn't hurt anybody! Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck.
%
How would you like to see the school counselor?

How would you like to suck my balls?
%
Holy shit dude.
%
Oh no, dude.
%
Mr. Mackey, can I ask a question?

Mmmkay, what?

What's the big fucking deal, bitch.
%
What the heck is a rimjaw?

Oh, that's when you put your legs behind your head and have somebody lick
your ass.
%
Young man, you will tell Mr... Mackey where you heard all these horrible
phrases.

I... I...

We can't tell you, We all took a sacred oath and swore ourselves to secrecy!

It was the Terrance and Philip movie.
%
What? Fuck you guys, I wanna get out of here.
%
Everybody's fucking seen it.

Eric!

I'm sorry, I can't help myself. That movie has warped my fragile little
mind.
%
No dude, I'd be scared too, you're mom is a fucking bitch.

Don't call my mom a bitch, you fat fuck!

Don't call me fat you buttfucking son of a bitch.
%
Chef, how do you make a woman like you more than any other guy?

Oh, that's easy. You've just gotta find the clitoris.
 
Huh?

Ooops.
%
Guys, do you know where I can find the clitoris?

The what?

What, is that like finding Jesus or something?
%
Allright, this is for the silver medal. Spell "forensics".

Oh, fuck that, why the fuck should I have to spell forensics.

Here you go. S-U-C-K M-Y A-S-S, forensics.
%
But minister, it isn't like this film is the first troublesome thing to come
out of Canada. Let us not forget Bryan Adams.

No, no. The Canadian government has apologized for Bryan Adams on several
occasions.
%
You're a fucking faggot, dude.
%
Step 1: Instead of 'ass' say 'buns'. Like 'kiss my buns' or 'You're a buns
hole'.
Step 2: Instead of 'shit' say 'poo'. As in 'bull poo' 'poo head' and 'this
poo is cold'.
Step 3: With 'bitch' drop the 't', 'Cause 'bich' is Latin for 'generosity'.
Step 4: Don't say 'fuck' anymore, 'Cause 'fuck' is the worst word that you
can say. So just use the word 'mmmkay'!
%
It's easy, Mmmkay!
%
Well Philip, I hope you've learned something through this whole experience.

I have Terrance. I've learned that you are a boner biting dick fart fuck
face.
%
That movie gets better every time I see it.
%
Oh my god... ahh! Ahh shit! Ahh shit. Ohhh!
%
Oh my god, you killed Kenny

You bastard.
%
Oh shit dude, now our moms are gonna find out we went to see the Terrance
and Philip movie again.
%
Fucking weak, dude!
%
Oh my god, they killed Kenny!

You bastards!
%
I bet him he couldn't do it. I bet him a hundred dollars...

C'mon Cartman, it's not your fault.

Oh, I know, I'm just fucking stoked I don't have to pay him.

That's real nice. He was your friend, you fat fuck!
%
Heya fuckface, you seen Gracie?
%
Should we blame the government?

Or blame society?

Or should we blame the images on TV?

NO! Blame Canada!
%
Blame Canada!
%
It seems that everything's gone wrong since Canada came along!
%
So guys, does it make you nervous to be in America? There are a lot of
organizations that want you arrested for destroying children.

Oh they'd have to find us first.

You're right... NOW!
%
Holy crap! Did you see that? They arrested Terrance and Philip!
%
What say you, Mr. American Ambassador?

Fuck Canada!
%
Alec, do you know what sucks about being a Baldwin?

No, what?

Nothing!
%
Haha! You missed me!
%
Mr. Garrison? How come our moms arrested Terrance and Philip?

Yeah? That's gay.

Your moms are just upset. They're probably just all on their periods or
something.
%
Well I'm sorry Wendy, I just don't trust anything that bleeds for five days
and doesn't die. Anyway children, lets start off with some vocabulary...
%
War?!

No! Gregory, no!

Now this is bad Wendy. Hold on to me.
%
Fallen one, I am Satan. I am your god now!

There is no escape.

Now feel the delightful pain.
%
Hey Satan, didja hear the news? A war just broke out up on earth.

Meet Saddam Hussein, my new partner in evil.
%
Move over Satan, you're just hogging all the fun. Yeah! Yeah, man this is
getting me so hot!
%
Saddam, will you let me do my job, please.
%
Rub my nipples as I torture this little piggy!
%
Saddam, can I talk to you over here for a second?
I don't see why you have to belittle me in fron of people like that.

Hey, relax guy.

Well sometimes I don't think you have any respect for me.

Aw, come here guy. Who's my cream puff?
%
Kyle, you need to stop being such a chicken shit and stand up to your
mother. You need to smack her in the face and say, "That's enough of your
shit, you fucking bitch!"
%
What would Brian Boitano do?
%
Yeah, what would Brian Boitano do?
%
Weeeeellllllll, Kyle's mom's a bitch, she's a big fat bitch, she's the
biggest bitch in the whole wide world, she's a stupid bitch, if there ever
was a bitch, she's a bitch to all the boy's and girls!

On Monday she's a bitch, on Tuesday she's a bitch, on Wednesday through
Saturday, she's a bitch then on Sunday, just to be different, she's a super
King Kamehameha bee-itch!

C'mon you know the words!
%
We must rid ourselves of anything Canadian.
%
It's this V-Chip. I hate it. I can't say any dirty words.

Really? So you can't say "fuck"?

No.

And you can't say "shit"?

Nope.

So you can't say, "I'm Eric Cartman the fattest fucking piece of shit in the
world"?

Fuck you. *AAAARGH*

Dude, sweet.
%
I want this V-Chip out of me! It has stunted my vocabulary.
%